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Asking and Responding Attention, Checking Understanding

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Academic Writing Assignments

By miftachudin arjuna - September 27, 2015

Change the sentences into simple form!

Sample 1:

Original text:

I have a girl friend, and her name is Laili. I often shopping with she, or we lesson together. We choice to same university in STAIN Salatiga, but we take different department. I take English department, and she takes PAI department. She know a lot of religion study, so she often help me lesson outside from English study. She has a job as a shopkeeper, but its do not make she lazy to school. She is aware need to study, and she never truant to school. She takes part time job, and she can focus to study. She can manage the time to work and study, so the study does not collision. She settle her work quickly, but she do thejob is good.

Revised text with marks up:

Proofed read text:

I have a girl friend. She is Laili. We often go shopping. Besides, we study together. We choose the same university; STAIN Salatiga. However, we take different department. I take English department. On the other hand, she takes PAI department. She knows a lot of religion study. Therefore, she often helps me to study English outside the class. She is a shopkeeper. Then she is not lazy to school. She needs to study. Also, she never plays truant from school. She takes part time job. In addition, she can focus on study. She can manage the time to work and study well., Thus, the study run smoothly. She settles her work quickly. Nonetheless, she does the job perfectly.

Task 1
Simplify and proof read the sentences in the following paragraph:

I have a nephew, and his name is Arta. Arta’s age is two years, and he was born 2012th.h he has white skin and corpulent, so he is very cute. Arta lived in Bekasi, but Arta’s family went Boyolali every years. Arta played in my home, and he was fall from chair. He god his leg bluster, so he cried under chair. It was make his leg ill, and he difficult to walk. The next day, we went to Tlatar, and Arta swam in child swimming pool. My nephew tried to jump, but he slipped by self foot. It’s make the all of people look he, so the people laughedthe happen.
My sister has dog and cat, her name is Santi. She love it’s, although her mother hate it’s. In the home, she always keeps her pets carefully. The name of Santi’s cat is kitty, although the cat is male. The dog name is Bobo, the colour is bround. Santi like animal before she has a pet. She like cat, dog, rabbit, butterfly, bird, than her choice dag and cat become her pet. She give eat every day for her pets, and give organic food. She brought her pet to hospital once time amount, the hospital name is Shasha. She always examined her pet in this hospital, and handled by Anita. She is especially animal doctor, although allergy feather from cat.
My sister has a interest hobby, the hobby is hiking. She was hiking Lawu, Merapi, Merbabu, Slamet, Sidoro mount. She was inspiration from her friends, since 4 years ago. She enjoyed the adventure. Although the trip suitable for a man. The trip made her feel happy and made new imagination. She toke hiking every holiday, so that the time suitable to recreation. She prepared many facilities, before her did it. She was borough sleeping bag, snack, water, medicine, while she hiking. She looked the beautiful view in the high, when she hiking. Anisa’s office gave time to take, than toke free time to hiking. She got new experience, when did the trip. She thinks that hiking is her live, her hobby is adventure.
Mother and I go to the store, and my sister makes a dinner for us. Before my father goes home from his work, I and my mother have to in the home and the dinner has to ready. It makes us to hard work because my father is perfectionist in everything and he always checks everything in detail. Although my father like that, it doesn’t make us feel annoying, it makes us become discipline and care the time. We learn from my father that everything is important for us, so we have to care with everything around us. My father is the best teacher for us and he always teaches us everything about moral and social value.
Yesterday I saw the man in the city park, and the man sat down with his dog. The man was talking to his dog, but the dog was not listening. Everyone around there looked him seriously, so it made the man felt shy but he didn’t care with anything around her. He only focused on his dog, and he just want to show to other that his dog was cute and funny. For a long time the man talked to his dog, his dog didn’t show anything that made the man felt happy, but the man didn’t give up about this. The man tried again, and his dog kept on silence, so it made people around there laughed and me too.
I and my family have a plan for holiday, but my friends ask me to join in their plan. Actually I and my family are going to the beach for holiday, and my friends will ask me to climb to the mountain. It makes me so confused, which one will I choose for holiday. I and my family will do the holiday in the same time with my friends, so I difficult to chose both of them. I will asked my friends to delay their holiday planning, so I can join with them, and surely both of the holiday planning will be realized. The holiday will come soon, and I will make a good plan for holiday. I will holiday with my family, and I will holiday with my friends too.
Last month I and my friends went to to Paris Beach but my sister went to Baron Beach. I went to Paris Beach by car and my sister went to Baron Beach by motorcycle. We brought some food, drink and also brought clothes. We met some people and talked with other there. I and my sister met in Malioboro and we bought some T-shirt. I bought batik T-shirt and she bought Dagadu T-shirt. Before came home we walked in “alun-alun” and ate “kucingan”. So amazing Jogjakarta city in the night, so we enjoyed it. And then we came home together.
Next holiday I and my family will go to my grandfather house, and will go to Sekarlangit water fall. We have planning will go there by car and will bring some fruits. I and my family will sleep there, and help my grandfather in rice field. My family will sleep there for three days, so we will bring some clothes. My family will make some cake to prepare “Idul Fitri”, but my mother will buy some igredients to make cake there. Some cake we will make, so we need some igredients. I want holiday this year so amazing.
KKN is one of P3M Program in STAIN Salatiga. All of students in eight semester must do this program. The first day in POSKO KKN I and my friends clean the house before we live there. And then we make planning for our program before we do something for our program. So many activities in POSKO KKN. In the morning before we cook, we clean the house and also wash the glass and plate. And then we cook to breakfast while the boys make planning for activity in afternoon. We always pray together and eat together, before we do something for today. When I go to market, my friend sweaps the floor. Everyday we teach children in our village, after we pray. We always share all about our problem in POSKO KKN every night, before we sleep. when we go home, all of my friends cry because they can not forget all about something in POSKO KKN.
There are two kinds person in the world. Who are they? Ya, they are ACHIEVER and COMPLACENT person. Achiever person always has a reason to work. He is an eustress person, he likes challenges. He has big dream and always keep hard work to reach it. He also has a way of thinking that not simple, but extra ordinary idea. He always wants to grow better, better and better. The achiever’s life will be really success. Whereas, the complacent is very different. He always feel satisfied with what he have done. He is a follower, don’t has his own choise . His thinking way is flat and his life flow without standart he don’t has target for his future. So, who are you?
Not only Java language that has degree of formality, but English also has it. If Java has three degrees (ngoko, krama inggil, krama alus), English has seven degrees. Ok, I give you a statement and I will write it by using seven degrees of formality. You will know the different of them. 1. Official language, the statement: “The consumption of any food is category prohibited in this area”. 2. Formal : “You’re requested not to consume any food in this area.” 3. Netral: “Eating is not allowed here.” 4. Informal: “Please, don’t eat here!” 5. Colloqualism: “You can feed your face here.” 6. Slang (the little rude language): “Put down that nosh!” 7. Taboo (the most rude language): “lay off the fucking nosh!”. Ya, that’s all. It is interesting, isn’t it?
Ramadhan is the ninth month of Hijriyah calender. The moeslims decreed to fast for the sake of Allah. Ramadhan fasting is meant to refrain from eating, drinking and how to control ourself from bad behaviours start from down until sunset. In our country many people cheer up Ramadhan with many costum such as make cakes and visiting among family members. Usually, in the school or islamic boarding house there is Ramadhan boarding house or known as Posonan that have purpose to encrease the faithfulness of student. In addition, when Ramadhan was came we have to offer pray more than usual, reading the holy quran, carry out tarawih pray,and keep healthy with choose the best lifestyle. So that, we will get a good quality of fasting.
Day by day, the day you had to go came soon. I accompanied you to buy everything you need later. I wonder if I could help you, I would be very happy. I knew I could not. I did not have any right to come to your house and help you. That night, when you leave me alone, the rain was falling as heavy as my tears. The sky was too dark, and the lamp was off, no lighting there. I could not saw him at all although he was standing in front of me. Then, I got a message that written “ I will always love you vie”. I saw him from the back, and I know he was crying too. I was surprised when my phone was ringing. He phoned me at the Soekarno-Hatta Airport. He told me that word again. Therefore, I had never forgot about that moment to remember. I was so sorry because I miss more whole day. I wish you all the best.
On last Wednesday night, I got a message from my friend, Advalina. She told me that her father died, but I could not believe it. Then, I got more messages friends about that news. In the next day, I and my friends made a planning to visit Advalina’s house, in simo. We got gather and went there at 10:45 a.m. by bus. All the long way, the roads was very excellent. It was challenging our mental. The roads were like the waves. I could not stay calm anymore. The bus got us turn left and right with some shakings, and got us up and down that made us laughed and laughed. I saw the beautiful scenery I have never seen such as, the green wood that waving their leaves to everybody saw them, the yellow rice field, the wide blue sky and the new white barrage. We really enjoyed the road although it always surprised us. Next, after we got out from the bus, we had to walk very long to arrive Advalina’s house, but it was fantastic journey.
After the long holiday, all of students have to back to school. So do I. going to school is one of my obligation as student. Besides, the school always get me to attend the class, do much home works whole day, collect some assignments, learn many lessons either we have ever got or yet, and of course, pass the test especially final test. Everything related to school is never nice. Why? Well, have you ever heard that learning and studying will affect our brains? Then when can’t stand the effect, that make us want to kill our self. This is one reason why I hate to study. In the other hand, when we studied, and we forget it at the exam, it will make us very sad in whole day. Therefore, come back to school means come back to busier day with no good time for jogging, shopping, and also hang out with friends. Moreover on sunday. I have to tidy and clean my room and replace all of my books in their places because I used to sleep while my book beside me.
Fast of ramadhan, is the month who very waited by people muslim in the world. It's the firs time i fast in the new place without my family. Yeah, now i'm in cottage. On the ramadhan this year i hope and pray for my fast be bless. I want to worship this time can being a great conversion in my life. I will happy, when eating "sahur" and waiting reverberation of maghrib. In the night, i will reading Al Qur'an and praying "tarawih". And once in a while overlook time breaking of fasting with my friends. The fast month is the purified and mont of bless. Eventhough i just 12 year old but, i want my fast in this year is complete. I with my friends in cottage will happy to arouse people for "sahur" with "kentongan". In this month will be a happiness and victory. Where in the end of fasting, we will run into the Great Day of Idul Fitri. We can mutual to forgive with family, friends and many more. I hope this month i will get to fast and making many goodness.

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